thinking about how skeptical my mom is of my autism recently

earlier we were literally reading my diagnosis, the documents that make up the autism diagnosis that she has used as a crutch for years, and multiple times she just said "you never did that" and when i said that i did she said "really? i don't think so"

she later went on to explain how i was "right on the line" and am "bearly autistic" despite all my scores (that she brushed over and then got all the numbers wrong but refused to accept that when i pointed it out) and that i'm "not really autistic"

whenever i do an "autistic" thing it's apparently not an "autistic" thing... but apparently she's the authority on this thing cause she went to "every autism meeting she could" in the early 2010s when they knew even LESS about autism then they do know, of which WE STILL KNOW VERY LITTLE, not to mention some, if not most of those meetings were sponsored by autism speaks.

but apparently i have no authority or knowledge on the disability that I was BORN with and that I face on a DAILY basis

she's hinted multiple times at the idea that i can just "get over" my autism, but whenever i confront her about this directly she completely changes her tone

she shifts to "well you'll always be autistic, that's not going away, but you can learn to stop your symptoms", and when i try to explain to her why the sources and studies she uses are flawed she dosen't listen to me and goes back to the same thing of saying she knows more about autism then i possibly could, DEPITE MY LITERAL... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJKHFKDLJSHFJKLADHNGJKLVFDSKASJHBGFJHKLSGJKLFSHG