why am i doing this

what's the point

who's gonna see it

recently i've been thinking about new york and in going through my pictures i stumbled across something i had forgotten about.

the strangers project, written notes by the people of nyc.

unfortunately at the time i wasn't able to go inside, but i had often fantacized about going and writing something and reading other's struggles

it feel like in our modern society we are being pushed away more and more, we've learned to hate each other, criticize each other, judge each other over trivial things.

i am terrified of living in a world like that... i'm scared to be who i am but i feel like i can't talk about it to anyone cause i'll just get judged. i'm not in a position to run away, but i wish i did. so many times in my life i regret not running away, even if i died in the cold maybe i would have been able to finally get through.

the people around me are so dismissive of who i am or others like me, and i can't do anything for myself until i can escape from these people.

if it feels like i'm being vague, i am. i'm terrified of myself, it's horrible. i feel like i'm never going to be comfortable in this body and i'll only find escape in certain death. if anyone around me caught on to who i really am... i fear it would ruin my life.